Just a little over a month ago, I felt I was at the edge of a breakthrough in my author career. I had just finished writing The Crush, was making good progress on its sequel, The Fall, was nearing 250 blog followers and received a fantastic start to my new author Instagram profile.
During this time, while I was hanging out with my boyfriend and/or our families, I often found myself distracted, looking up more methods to increase readership rather than live in the moment with the people I love most.
July 25th was my wake-up call. My boyfriend’s momma unexpectedly passed away. She was only in her mid-fifties. In the three years I knew her, she treated me like I was her own kid, and I will forever consider her to be my second momma. I think the world of her… and now I find myself wishing I had spent more time with her in the moment.
Her passing has inspired me to adopt a new mindset for self-publishing and marketing. I now realize that no matter how much time and effort I put into my books, even if I become the next best-selling author, it won’t be worth it if I’ve allowed it to consume all my time and neglect to cherish those precious moments with loved ones.
Her passing has also opened my eyes to enjoying the little things in life more. She was a very simple woman with simple tastes. She loved to wear t-shirts and jeans. She loved to ride her bike with her best friend. She loved her husband, sons, grandkids, and future daughter-in-laws. She was an amazing southern cook, and loved the art with a passion. She could have had a packed restaurant if she had wanted, but she never chased notoriety. She was content with the life she lived, and thanked God for it.
I want to be more like her. I don’t want my joy to reside in what the future may bring, but rather what I have right now.
Does this mean taking a break from writing, self-publishing, and marketing books? At first, I contemplated taking a blogging hiatus in August, meaning no posts for Authoring Arrowheads in September since I plan posts a month in advance… but I knew my boyfriend’s momma wouldn’t want me to do that. Though she remained humble, she worked her butt off every day to provide for her family, and to honor her would be to learn her method of balancing both the hustle and the downtime.
We just have to live each season of life knowing that God has good intentions. He’s the One who holds our future.
To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.