For the longest time, I had a Lydia Bennet mentality.
For those of you who love Pride and Prejudice as much as I do, you can imagine just how horrid that period of my life was. And, for those of you who have no idea what that means… I was boy crazy. Not just boy crazy… idiotically boy crazy to the point where I felt privileged if a guy wanted to text me because at least I was attractive to someone, even if I didn’t even really like him much.
Needless to say, it was a very dumb part of my past that I’m glad to say is over. However, it didn’t end because I found a boyfriend, but because I rediscovered God. Today, I’m going to be straightforward with you about why it’s important to wait until God provides you with a Christ-centered relationship.
The Road of Rejection
Girls, I’m just going to go ahead and throw some advice out there:
1) If a prospective guy texts you nonstop but never makes an effort to make plans with you, then he’s not worth pursuing.
2) If a prospective guy stops talking to you out of the blue for no given reason, do not, under any circumstances, fall for his charms again.
3) If you like a guy and he won’t acknowledge your existence, let it be. For the love of love, just let it be.
Over the course of my late teens and early twenties, I found through numerous instances that these truths are indeed self-evident, yet difficult to adhere to.
Sometimes the guy who is texting you seems really interesting, and you get addicted to talking to him everyday. Sometimes after he has stopped talking to you for a while, you’ll feel relieved when you see his name pop up on your phone again. And sometimes, you’ll notice some guy that you swear up and down is your dream guy, that you’re meant to be and all that hoo-ha… and he’ll ignore you as if his life depends on it.
Long story short, rejection isn’t fun at all. Trust me when I say that if you have been or are currently going through any of the scenarios above, that God didn’t let you go through that because He feels you’re not worthy of earthly love. Instead, God lets you be rejected by guys who are unworthy of a romantic relationship with you in order for you to recognize the love you truly need: a relationship with your Heavenly Father.
Seek Him, Not Them
“The Lord is good unto them that wait for Him, to the soul that seeketh Him.”-Lamentations 3:25
When you’re going through the single season, you may feel insecure due to failed attempts at love, or a lack of acceptance from guys who you have been interested in. Your first instinct may be to solve this problem on your own by trying to become acquainted with different guys, trying to find a boyfriend. But, please know that your attempts will be futile if you go about it with the wrong intentions.
If you claim to be a daughter of God, seek to engage in your relationship with Him first and foremost, and then He’ll lead you to the man He knows is right for you.
The main problem girls in the single season face, (including myself when I was there), is that we become obsessed with the idea that we have to have a boyfriend to feel validated. Therefore, we often let this obsession overshadow our love for God, and begin to become attracted to guys who are outside of His Will for us.
Be Equally Yoked
“Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?”-2 Corinthians 6:14
In a match-made-in-Heaven relationship, the couple will be equally yoked with one another. Being equally yoked means that they will share a love for God and His commandments, and that they will be able to encourage each other to follow Christ.
On the other hand, if a couple is unequally yoked, they will disagree about their spiritual beliefs, which will inevitably cause conflict in the long run. I can say from experience that if you are truly dedicated to following Christ, that God will save you from falling for a guy who will cause you to be led astray.
Remember, God wants what’s best for you, and having a long-term romantic relationship with someone who doesn’t acknowledge or believe in Him and His commandments is definitely not where He intends to place you.
God Hears You
“The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.”-Psalm 34:18
Single Christian women, God knows about the heartache you’ve suffered. God hears your prayers where you plead for a godly man to enter your life.
Likewise, He also knows who, when, where and how in which that relationship will begin. And trust me, when you finally find yourself meeting a godly man, you’ll be thanking God that He made you wait for him.
A godly man will build you up and encourage you to lean on Christ, not ignore you and leave you crying by yourself.
A godly man will show you Bible verses and pray for you, not ditch church on Sundays and belittle you.
It may not seem possible now, but if it’s in His will, God’s got a godly man specifically designed for you if you’ll simply let love take it’s course and wait on the Master with the plan.
Be patient, my dear. If it’s meant to be, He’ll let it happen. ❤
Talk to Me, Arrowheads!
How have you dealt with the single season of your life? Comment below with your top tips to help others who are going through similar feelings!
Did you enjoy today’s content? I am thinking about posting more Christian-based dating/relationship advice for teens and new adults. Let me know if you would like more of this content in the future!
Aim high, stay strong, and always hit your mark.